“We rip out so much of ourselves to be cured of things faster than we should that we go bankrupt by the age of thirty and have less to offer each time we start with someone new. But to feel nothing so as not to feel anything – what a waste!”

first of all, i wanna say this is one of those contemporary books i usually wouldn’t pick up or read at all; based on what usually catches my eye at a bookstore, at least. i mean, a summer romance thats filled with ‘prose’ and day dreaming, which sounds like a fucking nightmare of a book to me, and definitely not something i wanna burn braincells with. but something about this book really grabbed me, and i hate to admit this, but maybe its because a part of me can see myself in the shoes of the protagonist, hell, protagonist(s).

so, you’re either one of those, have been, or you are not, or have not been one of those people, and so this book will be very cliché and/or very odd in terms of descriptions of contemporary affection. unfortunately for me, i have been in that deep, sweeping crush with another person to which i wouldnt necessarily call love, personally, at least, not anymore; it is instead an almost paralyzing obsession with another persons presence, almost to the point of their existence.

personally, im not proud of it and i certainly dont think its healthy, although the book portrays and captures it very well, especially the intensity and the melancholy. after reading this book, for me, it stands out from other contemporary romance novels, as it does not follow the usual angsty romance where the lovers, finally, end up together, after struggling with their intense emotions. this definitely isnt a spoiler but if you are reading it for that warm fuzzy cutesy feeling you get from other romance novels, you’re in for a ride of disappointment.

The story revolves around Elio, a seventeen year old boy who falls into a deep romantic and sexual desire and obsession with Oliver, the twenty-four year old student who becomes a summer guest at Elio’s parents’ Italian summer house. if this isnt the perfect setting for a romance novel, then i dont know what is.

Aciman manages to write a novel based on the most crushing thoughts and painful emotions, that its almost too much to read Elio’s thoughts and actions as hes always too close but too far away. this book is a painfully romantic, physical, miserable, and intimate ride.

“Right now there’s sorrow. I don’t envy you the pain. But I envy you the pain.”

It might not be my usual choice of book, but I think Call Me By Your Name is one that will stay with me.